DEPUT IN XZW

*Big Show just won a match
*then he lihts go off
*then it goes back and there isa person on the ring

Person:Mynam is Jonmir Hnedrick V. Pascua or you can call me JHVP and i have come here to conquer this league and prove that im the best i the world

*then JHVP attacks big show
*then JHVP knocks out big show

JHVP:You should be ashamed of yourself that the world biggest athlete ishe worlds biggest loser!!!!

Jr:This is the1st time ivsaw big show knocked ojt

Michael Cole:Its not fair that this person shows domination and just people up

u dont know anything about rps do you

Jonmir Hendrick V. Pascua wrote:

*Big Show just won a match
*then he lihts go off
*then it goes back and there isa person on the ring

Person:Mynam is Jonmir Hnedrick V. Pascua or you can call me JHVP and i have come here to conquer this league and prove that im the best i the world

*then JHVP attacks big show
*then JHVP knocks out big show

JHVP:You should be ashamed of yourself that the world biggest athlete ishe worlds biggest loser!!!!

Jr:This is the1st time ivsaw big show knocked ojt

Michael Cole:Its not fair that this person shows domination and just people up

Problem numero uno - THIS IS NOT A WWE RP FORUM, this is XZW, if you want to use characters, then they have to be characters that exist in THIS federation.

So characters like Big Show, J.R., and Michael Cole will not exist in this federation.

Problem numero dos (I'm sticking with a theme here people, shut up) - This RP is WAAAAAAAAAY too short. There needs to be detail here.

Let me explain it like how Jonathon Wulf would take this, and it will show you how the RPs are supposed to look like.

-----------------
Bobkill is victorious over his match with The Crowing, the crowd cheering in excitement

As Bobkill celebrates 'You're Gonna Go Far, Kid' by The Offspring begins to play, making the cheers stop.

Out steps a six foot, three inch man. He is smiling evilly, revealing a row of sharpened teeth as he looks over the crowd.

His eyes lock on Bobkill as he raises the microphone to his lips.

Jonathon Wulf: Congratulations on making a name for yourself, Bobkill. I'd almost be jealous about what you've just done...except...

Jonathon Wulf begins walking down the ramp, the microphone still in his hands as he enters the ring.

Jonathon Wulf: Except, you now are looking at someone that needs his name known.

Jonathon Wulf bashes the microphone into Bobkill, beating him down mercilessly. After some time he pulls away and slides outside the ring, finding a black steel chair.

He takes out a silver marker and signs the chair in his name, all the while laughing like a maniac.

Going back in the ring he goes to the other side of where Bobkill is and waits for him to stand up.

Bobkill stands up and turns into Jonathon Wulf, who bashes the steel chair into Bobkill's face. Bobkill is gripping his head and rolling on the ring floor, blood has started to pour from his forehead.

Jonathon Wulf picks up the microphone and places his foot on top of Bobkill's bleeding forehead as he leans into the fallen wrestler.

Jonathon Wulf: I am Jonathon Wulf! And you are my prey!

With a definitive stomp into Bobkill's head, Jonathon Wulf throws the microphone down and leaves the ring.

Bobkill is still rolling on the ring floor in pain as Jonathon Wulf howls out to the booing crowd.
-----------------

In that RP, I explained who I was, what my little gimmicks are (Being animalistic and carrying a black chair signed in my name), and made the beatdown interesting to read and follow through with in your imagination. Make your introduction noticeable! Not only that, but every RP you should participate in should be noticeable in some way or form, for example, I could escalate this situation with Bobkill and it can become a feud easily, or I could make it a situation that I can pick and choose what I want to do.

Jonathon Wulf reacts to situations as they come to him, the only time he will feud is if he is feeling threatened by someone. Which is why Jonathon takes exceptional hatred against helnik17 as he is a major threat to Jonathon's normal antics of beating down everyone that crosses his path.

Problem numero tres - In your RP there is PLENTY of misspellings and grammatical issues, so be sure to read it through carefully before even sending it in, that's why we have a preview button. This isn't a race either, so take your time to read over your things before posting them, even now I'm pushing about 15 - 20 minutes before I finish this.

Hopefully we all learned a little bit in this tyrannical rant, but as a recap, THIS IS XZW, don't make your RPs short and uninteresting, and take your time to overview your RPs and posts before sending them in.

Class Dismissed.

Exactly my thoughts John... @Captain amazing... Look up the rules and guidlines section on how to rp.. and try making another better one ok?

And btw No wwe superstars must be used.